More late-night tv: Dutch tv has lots of those late night phone sex ads. They’re usually pretty similar to similar ads in other countries, women trying to sound as sexy as possible while reciting a telephone number; except for one I saw last night, which featured a woman who sounded like someone’s mum. Not a dominatrix, just a typically scary Dutch woman. People probably call because they’re too scared not too.

Watching Jerry Springer last night (it’s important to work with the stereotypes of being unemployed), a guest told Jerry that she walked in on her boyfriend and her housemate in bed together. She left without them seeing her, and the first thing she did was call the Jerry Springer show.
I just don’t know what to say.

Sydney Morning Herald article on Linux chix with the naff headline, “Linux grrls break free“. Still, it’s coverage for both Linux and chicks in IT.

I came across this ad on the notice board at the library on Prinsengracht. It was an A4 page with a colour photo at the top, of this guy who wanted to start a communal house and was looking for people to help him build it, in working parties one Sunday a month. He claimed to be gender dysphoric, and that he was two-thirds female and one-third male. So he wanted to live in a house where everyone could explore life without gender stereotypes. He had a plan where the women would have sex with other women, and the men would have sex with the women, but no men would have sex with men. This seems strange to me, because unless his two-thirds of womanhood was gay, he’d be attracted to men, at least in part; but the best bit was the Freudian translation into Dutchlish:
Spiritual Growth House – At Erection – for four bisexual women and two heterosexual men.

The Queen mum arrives in heaven and gets a welcoming party.
When she walks into the party she is immediately greeted by Diana.
Wanting to make polite conversation she remarks that Diana has a lovely halo and that “we would like one just like it”.
To which Diana replies: “You stupid cow, it’s a f*%$’ing steering wheel!”

You’d think I’d have something interesting to say, having all this time on my hands, but it’s the opposite. Maybe because the only news I get now is in Dutch, and it’s hard to rant when you’re not quite sure if you’re getting the news right.

And now, a joke:
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet.
“My dog’s cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him? ”
“Well,” says the vet, “let’s have a look at him”
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says “I’m going to have to put him down.”
“What? Because he’s cross-eyed?
“No, because he’s really heavy”

I sent a letter to John Howard about protecting ancient forests today, via the Greenpeace site. You can send a letter to your leader by going to http://act.greenpeace.org/aas/e?a=cbd1&s=fst.
You can also protest Japan’s continued hunting of endangered whales for ‘scientific’ research: http://act.greenpeace.org/ams/e?a=faj&s=whl or the legalisation of seed contamination of conventional seeds by genetically modified seeds in the EU at http://act.greenpeace.org/ams/e?a=eu_seeds&s=blue2.

(March 31, 2002). If it was April 1, these articles from the Sunday Times would make more sense.
Firstly, a report that the British Forestry Commission is ‘landscaping’ forests to make them less ‘frightening’ and ‘less intimidating’, spending millions of pounds and chopping down up to 15% of trees in some forests.
“We have started developing more areas where people can feel safe, with dappled shade and open areas where flowers such as bluebells can spread”. They’ve also added ‘water features’ such as a man-made lake, as “water features seem to hold the greatest aesthetic value rather than the actual trees”.
Secondly, “Tony Blair has been forced to abandon plans to release an intelligence dossier on Iraq because it did not contain enough evidence to support a military campaign against the country”. The document was withdrawn “because it failed to establish that Saddam Hussein was a growing threat”.
It’s a shame for Blair, because he’s expected to make a “fresh pledge of military support for any American action against Iraq” when he meets Dubya on Friday. And worse, a “senior MI6 official” said, “we just do not believe Saddam is sponsoring international terrorism”.
“Blair is now expected to urge Bush to publish his own dossier based on CIA intelligence, or risk losing a worldwide propoganda war against Iraq”.

Did I mention that I really, really hate looking for jobs? It doesn’t help that so many ads are complete crap. One was looking for a ‘web specialist” with an MSCE.